CONSTANTINE is internally inconsistent, theologically unsound, and utterly ridiculous. Nevertheless, it's trying so hard to entertain you that you can't help but like it. Case in point: in every thriller, there comes a moment when the hero's had all he can stands, and he can't stands no more. This moment usually involves the hero's arming up, looking resolute, and saying something along the lines of, "Let's get 'em!" When Keanu Reeves's John Constantine has this moment, he whips out this weapon that's a cross between a shotgun, a revolver, and a giant crucifix, all done in solid gold. While I doubt that laughter was the intended effect, you can't deny the earnestness of a production that conceived, created, and shot a giant golden crucifix-shotgun-revolver.
Go in expecting a cheesy good time, and you won't be disappointed.
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