Odds and Ends

The Bounty

The Bounty tells the story of H.M.S. BOUNTY, Captain Bligh, and the mutiny led by Fletcher Christian.  It features a delightful, Vangelis synth score, magnificent overacting by a young Mel Gibson, and a glacial pace.  If that sounds like your cup of coconut water, have at it.

Ricki and the Flash

Ricki and the Flash tells the story of an aging would-be rock star in a San Fernando Valley cover band, the ex-husband and children she left behind to pursue her dreams, and the year when the chickens come home to roost.  It’s solid material, anchored by a powerhouse Meryl Streep performance, some subtle work from Kevin Kline, and even a solid turn by Rick Springfield in a supporting role as Ricki’s lead guitarist and love interest.

This is the kind of character study that depends utterly on its star, and it will surprise no one to find that Ms. Streep is entirely up to the task.  She makes us want to watch her even when we don’t like her, and want to watch her even more as or perceptions begin to change.  Truly, this actress Can Do No Wrong.

The Salvation

Hey, do you like Westerns?  Do you like Mads Mikkelsen and Jonathan Pryce?  Me too, but I’m sorry to report that not even Mssrs. Mikkelsen & Pryce can save this Western.

The Salvation is your basic revenge tale, with Mikkelsen going after the thugs who do away with a couple of barely sketched out characters named, I think, “Wife” and “Son.”  Things spin out of control, there’s a showdown, blah blah blah.  The movie looks cheap, the villain lacks complexity, and the whole thing is a drag.  If you’re really in the mood for a Western, go watch Open Range again, instead.

Let Me In

Let The Right One In is a brilliant, Swedish take on the modern vampire story.  Let Me In, the American remake starring Chloe Grace Moretz, lacks the beauty and subtlety of the original and exchanges it for ugliness and plodding literalism.  Stay outside.

The Jungle Book

The Jungle Book is a triumph of storytelling and technical filmmaking.  It’s beautiful, engaging, age-appropriately scary, and entirely convincing.  We loved it.

Valhalla Rising; Jurassic Park

Valhalla Rising


Valhalla Rising is Nicholas Winding Refn's tribute to Terrence Malick. A beautiful, almost langorous, film, Valhalla Rising isn't so much about compelling narrative as it is about atmosphere and mood. This is a film meant not to be seen, but absorbed.

Mads Mikkelsen (of the excellent Flame& Citron) plays One-Eye, a Viking slave who lives like a dog, released from his pen only to fight for the enrichment of his owners. After escaping, he falls in with a band of Christians on a journey to fight in the Holy Land. Things do not go well.

That's all you need to know. The rest of your rental (or streaming) choice will come down to two questions: 1. Do you like Terrence Malick? 2. Do you like Mads Mikkelsen? If you answer yes on both counts, hit “play.” If not, all the atmosphere and mood in the world won't keep you from checking your watch. Fortunately for me, I answer yes. I enjoyed Valhalla Rising.

Jurassic Park

Last week, my beautiful bride & I realized we hadn't seen Jurassic Park since its initial release. Worse, we hadn't shown it to our kids. We were bad parents!

Having rectified the situation, I'm happy to report that Jurassic Park holds up remarkably well. Though some of the actors' makeup calls attention to itself on a large HD screen, the dinosaurs look as realistic as ever, the story (which basically consists of a series of missions – Tour the park! Escape the pen! Get to the whatsit and turn on the thingamajig! Etc.) moves right along, and the whole endeavour is just as engaging, scary, and fun as ever. We loved it, our kids loved it, and we are good parents once more.

After the Wedding

In After the Wedding, Mads Mikkelsen (Casino Royale, the exceptionally good and well worth seeing Flame and Citron) works in a Bombay orphanage.  He teaches school.  He looks after the kids.  He does fundraising.  He’s poor, but he’s noble and happy.  And he’s got that lean, tanned, Adventure Guy thing working for him.

One day, his boss calls him in and tells him he must fly to Copenhagen to meet with a deep-pockets philanthropist whose money they need to keep the orphanage open.  Mikkelsen doesn’t want to go, but he consents.

So far, so good.  I’m with him right up ‘til he tells one of his waifs, “I’ll be back in ten days, tops.  I promise I’ll be there for your birthday.”  See, I know this is a drama, so I know there was no way he’s going to make it back in time for that birthday.  I know the waif will guilt him out, I know he’ll feel badly about it, and I know that it’ll all be a part of the second-act crisis.  Suspension of disbelief = blown.

Once Mikkelsen gets to Denmark, the donor inexplicably invites him to attend a family wedding.  Surely, weddings were put on this earth as a test of loyalty, for they rank among the most crushingly dull of all ceremonies.  Loyal friends and relatives can reasonably be called upon to attend, but glancing acquaintances?  No way – that’s too much to ask.  So here am I, an audience member of this film, watching a crushingly boring wedding through the eyes of a glancing acquaintance.  Not only do I not believe in the proceedings on the screen before me, I’m looking at my watch. 

But hey, this movie’s called After the Wedding, so there’s gotta be some drama coming, right?  Well, yeah, but I know that it’ll all lead to Mikkelsen calling the sad-faced waif back in India and telling him sorry, he won’t make that birthday after all.  And I’m pretty sure nothing’s going to explode, because this doesn’t seem like that kind of movie.  So now, instead of catching myself up in the personal drama of Mikkelsen, the donor, and other attendees of the titular wedding, I’m just watching the plot’s gears turn and waiting for it to be over.

A lot of people, people whose opinions I respect, love this movie.  I stopped believing, like, ten minutes in, and that was it.  Seeing After the Wedding was like attending a wedding: an excruciatingly dull affair I endured out of loyalty.  Your mileage, of course, may vary.